gabrielthetricksterarchangel:
- “Harry, if you don’t stop molesting me with your eyes I’m going to throw you out of a second story window”
- “If one more person mentions my hair I swear to god I’m going to commit first degree murder in front of like a hundred witnesses”
- “That shirt is atrocious and I am ashamed to even know of its existence”
- “What the fuck made you think that was okay on any level?”
- “I hate you all”
- “No, you plebeian, I do not want one of your germ-infested free samples they’ve probably been on that tray for years anyway”
- “Oh god it touched me I’m going to have to cut off that foot now”
- “I’m not a cat and the next person to compare me to one will find out what it feels like to have my entire foot up their ass”
- “Coffee is god’s second most important gift to mankind, with the first being me, of course. Harry, stop laughing”
- “I can’t tell if that’s a picture of a barf stain or your dog”
- “Why would you ever”
- “This conversation has officially bored me to tears, so I’m going to go do something more entertaining, like watch grass grow. Draco out.”